i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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