why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
How does it feel to date your dad?
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
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