what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Life is so much better after having sex.
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
Randomize
