he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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