Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
I just woke up on my kitchen floor using a yellow pages as a pillow and surrounded by plants that used to be in the garden around my apt building, can't wait to see the security tapes for my eviction
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
I made him laugh his dick is mine
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
