How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
tonight lets celebrate not being married
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
Randomize
