P.S. I can't hear my feet
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
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