she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
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