Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Randomize
