id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
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