I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
Randomize
