Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
Randomize
