I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
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