You really coming over, don't trick.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
Randomize
