swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
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