Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
Randomize