And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
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