After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
Cover your peen. We're going out.
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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