I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
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