Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Randomize
