Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
well, you know. whores of a feather.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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