You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
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