I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
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