saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
