so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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