I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
He told me i was the nicest person he's ever arrested for DUI
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
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