I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
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