u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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