Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Randomize