This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
Side note: I apologize for sex being the subject of every single one of my texts. That's what happens when you date an older man who constantly denies you sex on the basis of his ridiculous morals.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
i out mim tonsoeep
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