Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
You know what would have been funny if we got arrested last night? The inventory search of the lock box:\n\nContents:\n1 work ID\n1 33 round Glock magazine\n1 set of keys\n1 vibrator\n2 bags fruit snacks\n1 parking hang tag
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
