we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
