As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
Randomize
