I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
Randomize
