Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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