So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
Randomize