Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
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