I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize
