and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Randomize
