You made me cry and you don't even care
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
Randomize
