marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Randomize
