My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Randomize
