Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize