Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Randomize
