i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
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