All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
Randomize