Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
3pm strippers are depressing
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
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