Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize
