Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
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