Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
Randomize
